Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Anorexia Is Soooo Cool

I have always known that anorexia was quite popular with the gays, and everyone fabulous, but I had no idea how rampant it had become until just recently.

For Thanksgiving this year I decided to spend five long hours dedicated to cooking a meal for three fags. I should have just put a handle of vodka on the table, and some no carb no calorie snacks and called it a day, but I decided to do it old school and make the turkey, the stuffing, the yam stuffed baked apples, the mashed potatoes, all from scratch. Well the turkey was in a bag, but I did watch the built in thermometer to make sure I pulled it out once it popped! During our Thanksgiving extravaganza one of the gays I was cooking for decided it was time to complain about how fat she looked in her sweater. That's right, while getting ready for the holiday dedicated to pigging out I had to console a gay that he was not fat. In order to save time waiting to eat for a self conscious gay to go through twenty-some costume changes I told him that he did not look fat, and in fact he looked anorexic. At this point he turned to me with a twinkle in his eye, and a relieved look on his face, and said, "You mean it? OMG thank you!"

On what planet is it ok to look anorexic? My entire life I have been made fun of for being too skinny, and now it's a sought after image?

I was again brought back to reality upon hearing Kate Moss tell an interviewer that she has been able to maintain her waif-like appearance by holding true to the mantra that, "Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels."

Luckily I am now no longer part of this group of super fabulous anorexics, because according to my friends I have turned a little pudgy weighing in at 156 on a 6'-2" frame. I think this is why only 10% of the population is gay..... it is just way easier being straight, having a few beers and a whole pizza while watching a football game, than it is being a constantly hungry queer. So for all you single ladies out there guess who is now on the market?!

luvuANObitches!

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